Please don't touch me
The woman at the coffee shop who was clearly not well.
I got out of school early today, just a bit. The school has early dismissal on Mondays and the teacher I was covering for had the last period as her prep, so I taught five hours straight without a break (teachers don’t get breaks) and then they didn’t need me so I went home.
After petting Loviefluffy and doing a few things, I set out on my walk. I tend to walk the same route, down to the park and around it, to avoid going through those many intersections where people run stop signs without looking up from their phones. I miss walking through the residential areas, but it’s too dangerous these days.
My favorite coffee shop, owned by an Ethiopian family I’ve known for years, has a fabulous ginger tumeric tea that is delightful on a cold day, so I stopped in for a cup. After my walk I stopped back by to use the restroom on my way home. They don’t mind - I’m a good customer.
As I walked in, a woman who had a strange look in her eye snapped her fingers almost right in my face, yelling, “Happy holidays!” I scooted past and she started to follow me toward the bathroom then she stopped.
After using the restroom I headed for the door. The strange woman and another woman were standing in the doorway, almost blocking it, so I said, “Excuse me, please,” and attempted to walk by.
As I walked by, the strange woman reached out and petted my head. She started to grab my hair but I jerked away and through the door.
“Please don’t touch me,” I said calmly, but in my “Don’t mess with me,” voice.
She walked out and proceeded across the street, yelling something incomprehensible about “Poor Stevie!”
Hmmmm.
This person did not appear to be homeless or even poor. Was she just off her meds?
I’m guessing this kind of thing doesn’t happen in the nice suburb or rural area where many of you live, and if it did, the authorities might be called sooner rather than later.
It’s funny because I can just imagine the lectures of the woke Left: this woman, being black and in West Philly, must be the victim of some kind of oppression, therefore we should welcome her wackiness and not be offended at all that she tried to pet me without my consent.
NO. If a man of any kind reached out and tried to touch a woman after aggressively screaming and snapping in her face, everyone would be mad.
My days are spent trying to help kids learn to be civil human beings who can get good jobs and eventually support their own families, raising their own children with dignity and security. In pursuit of this goal, I have to put up with all kinds of crazy all day. It takes all I have to put up with the violation of any kind of civil norms that I live with all day at work. I just want to get a cup of tea, take a walk and use the restroom in peace when I get home.
No one has the right to my time, attention, or to touch me without permission. The bizarre behavior that passes for okay around here has gone too far. People run around the neighborhood in large groups with a Palestinian flag? Silly, but whatever. Waste your time and burn some calories. But I’m so sick of the aggressive beggars, the people writhing and screaming on the sidewalks, and now this.
I know, I gotta move. But it’s complicated. And there are many things worth fighting for here.
Still, I could use some personal space.
If anyone wants to pet me, please just ask. If you wash your hands and are a card-carrying cat or dog parent, I might let you.
This beautiful bird lives in Sweden where no one reaches out to touch someone.



As a cat carrying cat person you may pet me. Meow. 😻
May I pet you virtually, just in commiseration?