God Is a Big Black Cat

Clarifying my view of religion

Much of this blog has been about my religious and spiritual journey. Progressive Christian to Conservative Jew to Zionist Christian? All true. But as I have attempted to make conscious contact with God, I find that the traditional representations of God in both Jewish and Christian traditions don’t quite… fit.

When I was a kid, about first grade maybe, we were asked in Sunday school to draw a picture of our concept of God. All the other kids drew men with beards. I drew a big circle, like a smiley face sticker, with blocks of all different colors inside it. My mom still has the pictures. My Sunday school teachers were alarmed, but Mom loved it. Think outside the beard.

In prayer, meditation and communion with the spirits, a clear image emerges. It does not have to be your concept of God. It’s my concept of God.

A giant lion, like Aslan of the Chronicles of Narnia, but black. He’s the Father Cat. The father of the pride and of all of creation, he created us and protects us. But he does see us as marionettes or as his employees. We have free will, and can use it for the good of the pride or not. He expects his daughters to hunt, as lionesses would in the wild. Mostly he sleeps and protects the pride when called upon to do so, while his daughters range the grasslands to find and kill prey.

In Christian tradition Jesus is portrayed as a shepard and we are his flock. That’s all fine for some, but I don’t identify with sheep. As a sign at one of the high schools where I teach says, “The lion does not concern himself with the opinions of the sheep.” It’s not that I think I’m better than anyone else, and my mom has a lovely collection of stuffed sheep. It’s just that the grazing metaphor doesn’t do it for me. How can I be motivated to do God’s work if it involves chewing on grass? According to Google AI, sheep spend most of their days “eating and ruminating.” That’s exactly what I’m trying to avoid!

Don’t be alarmed - I’m not planning to go out and start eating my stop sign running neighbors in response to their sin! It is not for me to enforce the law, though I can advocate for law enforcement to do so. Approaching God’s work as a cat would approach the prey means being silent when appropriate, waiting as long as necessary, and knowing when to pounce!

Organizers among us are familiar with this way of living. You don’t ask someone to sign a card until you know they will say yes. You don’t file for an election until you know you will win. Timing is everything.

One of my favorite tricks to pull on my students goes like this:

Student, usually seventh grade: Miss, do you have kids?

Ms. Smith: Yes, I have a daughter. She’s twelve. She’s black.

Student: Your daughter is black!!! How do you have a daughter who’s black?

Ms. Smith: What, you got a problem with it if I’m married to a black man?

Student: No miss no! No problem with that! That’s cool!

Ms. Smith: Would you like to see a picture of my daughter?

(Kid nods enthusiastically.)

(I pull out my phone and show the kid the picture of Loviefluffy on my lock screen.)

Student: Miss, that’s a cat!

Ms. Smith: I know that’s a cat. That’s my daughter Loviefluffy. She’s a twelve year old cat.

Student: But you said her father was black!

Ms. Smith: Well, she’s a black cat, so I assume he was too. But he may have been a gray tabby…

Teaching kids in the hood is fun because I get to play these games. They are fanciful enough to go with it (unlike the well educated white millenials I’ve had the pleasure of working with… some very nice people but God help you if you deviate from the script!) and still young enough to be a little gullible. Even older kids like to play these kinds of games. It tests their brains in ways to which they are not accustomed.

Such is an example of the mental hunt. I seek a way to engage the kids. They are used to having their heads buried in computer or iPhone screens, but they need to learn to talk with adults in person. Getting their attention takes deviating from the script.

Breaking script is my superpower.

Such is the description of God as a big black cat. It got your attention.

Here is a prayer to the Black Cat God:

Our father, who art a cat, hallowed be thy paws

Thy catdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven.

Give us this day our Chewy shipment and forgive us our trespasses, even though we have none because we are cats.

Lead us straight to Temptations and deliver us from the vacuum

For thine is the catdom, the purrer, and the fluffy, furrever.

Meow.

Loviefluffy on the hunt… unfortunately for her but fortunately for them, there is a window separating her from the birds she seeks to eat!